Living today

Today I sit and think about the past,
Flooded with blurred memories,
Missing moments that have long come and gone,
Wishing I could step back in time,
And remember the warmth of you,
Yesterday I dreamed only of the future,
Looking forward to what can be and not what it,
I ignored the life going on around me,
Now I regret not paying attention,
Wanting to step through time's window,
And try it all again,
Fortunately God gave life no rewind button,
I can now focus on today,
Live in every moment like it was meant to ve,
Like every moment is tailored specially for me,
Tomorrow I will live in the light,
Ignore the tender emrcy of God not more,
I am at home in the moment,
And I can travel briefly to the past,
But I will no longer live there,
I am now living to make things last,
I am living to do thy Lord's will,
For that I am thankful,
For that I am humble,
Because I know it will help me to see Him again

Falling Star

Today I fell in love with a falling star,
 He hurt me when he fell into my heart so hard,
Dropping into my life like a hook on an anchor,
Filling me with so much love my heart is in danger,
I became lost in his eyes,
Not questioning that he fell from the skies,
 No need to play the flirting game,
 Not caring about from where he came,
He is an angel to me,
 And isn't that what love should be?
 He likes me for what is on the inside,
He's teaching me there is no reason to hide,
No I do not think he is the one for me,
 But it is far too soon to see,
I live for this moment with him in my heart,
 Not seeing an end but loving the start,
Yes, I fell in love with a falling star,
I have fallen for him so very hard,
He brings a smile to my face,
I love the way he can keep up with my pace,
The way he makes me feel,
Please let this all be real,
No tears today in my eyes,
As I watch him return to the blue skies,
Having learned a memorable lesson,
Thanking God for such a blessin',
He will always be my fallen star,
But now it is time for him to return to the place so far,
He belongs next to Mother moon,
Can't wait to see him again real soon,
Goodbye for now my fallen star,
Here I keep my heart for you saved in a glass jar,
Until the day you come again to see me,
You, and only you still hold my heart's key

Risky me

Sick of watchin' life pass me by,
Sick of pretending everything is goin' fine,
Want to reach out and snatch it,
Not strong enough to hold and handle it,
Thought today was different than the last,
Life is spinning by so incomprehensibly fast,
Got to take it and handle it,
Keep speeding by so quick,
Is it that I'm not strong, or smart, or pretty,
Kate lookin' in the mirror and being afraid to see,
Who is that blonde beauty?
No way that girl is the real me,
Hatin' that they see only who I pretend to be,
Bein' me seems to be life's grand key,
Question is, who made the lock?
No body knows all the strength I keep in stalk,
Who is going to grow the seed?
How much do I have to bleed?
His beautiful sparkling diamond eyes,
No idea how to reach me, no matter how hard he tries,
I am cold hard steal,
Unable to feel,
Too fake to breathe,
Too surreal to see,
Sick of listenin to idiots talk,
Watchin' them strutting down the block,
Where do I go from here?
I'm left without a reason to fear,
When death comes to steal all time,
I'll let him take all of mine,
My destiny was always my hidden lifeline,
When it comes to an end I'll be just fine,
For this is the way God intended it to be,
Baby please don't cry for me,
This life is mine to hold,
The reason I am so risky and bold,
Don't forget there are times when you need to give in and fold,
And I will always be your blanket when life gets cold,
I am risky and open,
I am blind to the thoughtlessness of the broken,
This is the time you simpley cannot forget,
There is a reason we met,
Our paths crossed for a reason,
At the time of our meetin',
Now it is time to say goodbye,
TIme to leave the cards where they lie.

Doomed to Love

Doomed to Love

Written by Staci Lyn and Cadmus Natori.

Him:

Warning, my thoughts are open.
In life, I see people happy together and ask myself, Why not me?
My mind often turns to things of paranoia and doubt,
As I fight against myself each day, and still I don't know why.
I have lost myself. 
I know not who I am. 
This is my burden,
I almost fare to hope for what I know I can't have;
Could never have even if it were offered to me directly.
If you knew my heart,
You would never have known.
And still I live a hollow life.
My web spun of lies and doubt. 
Fearing that any man might find a glimpse of my soul.
Mind me not, for who am I,
Who you thought you knew, but a mask,
Emotion carved artificially into my face as though by hand of some unknown puppet master, 
Once recognizable as myself,
Now simply a shadow.
Forced to live as though nothing is wrong,

as I slip slowly away into darkness.
Who am I to deny the human heart of its need to create,
Or of its lust to destroy?
Who are we as a whole? 
We who defy nothing, But would enslave ourselves or our loved ones at the sound of two coins, One against the other,
Pounding out the death of all humanity. 
One by one as we begin to turn one another, until one is left
In his right hand a sword. 
In his left, a bag of useless gain.
Full of hopeless victory.

Me:

I love you with hate, 
Hate you with love.
Passion is a rock castle,
pride a wounded love, 
Moving through as a river of blood, 
Bonding that which cannot be bound, 
And deafening all sound, 
Dragged by a merciless love, 
Freed by passionate hate,
Struck down with injustice,
Suffocated with righteousness, 
Forever to hold light, 
But never to keep life.

Him:

If only blood were only as a river. 
That it came from the ground and returned thence,
If only the blood were not of my hands,
Of my heart.

Me:

Swift as a knife,
Soft as a sound,
keeping pace with it all,
Risen only to fall, 
Dear brother, what am I?
A monster bound,
Of an angel fallen to ground?
If thine blood were spilled,
Spilled also is mine,
To care is to fear,
To fear is to hide from what is there,
Hence love is obtained only through spilled blood,
Wounded and weary,
Freakish and eery, 
Lost is the tide, 
Sent running to hide, 
Love is mine own, 
As your heart is my home.

Him:

Those doomed to die,
Are those most fortunate,
For I am doomed to live,
To repeat my sins until the end of time,
Like and Eldritch spectator,
Wandering,
Never able to right the wrongs,
Or stop the pain I cause,
Doomed to love,
Not even in death do I find solace,
For in death await those whom I have murdered, thought,
Those who haunt my living death,
My waking sleep,
But is the night good that o'erlooks the dawn of judgement?
When looking down on he who is guiltless and still must die,

Can you call it a good night for he who must swing the sword?
That is the life I live, 
This is the path I wander,
And I must wander alone,

Me:

So foolishly sublime,
Forever alone is inconceivable,
As wondering alone is not feasible,
Dear sir, thou are wrong,
And such knowledge will take you long,
Art thou blinded by fear?
For the reason we are here?
Family is our goal,
But you are still yet a little foul,
Yet to learn the rules of life,
Stupidity sharp as a knife,

Him:

If only it were as simple as a game of searching,
What fair maiden could look upon a beast,
Such as the one staring through the looking glass at me,
And still find strength to speak?
Nay, I testify that each one must invariably turn and fly,
Before the foreboding foe's face,

Me:

Remember,
Remember,
Family is forever,
Not today or the marrow,
Should thou be with sorrow, 
Still emerging from a cocoon,
Nay, a babe still sleeping in the noon,

Him:

But I must yet hide myself away,
In hope of not harming the one I love,
She who detests my very existence,
Yet still she for whom I would die for,

Me:

Woman a creature of love and passion,
Too frail to hold,
Yet too strong to flee,
For no beast is thee,
A kitten trying to roar,
Is nay more scary than a moving door,
No woman who is meant for you,
Can ever fight loving as they do,
Love is the beast,
Far too strong to defeat,
So warm to hold,
Innocent, yet bold,

Him:

Love is the only poison that does not kill,
But instead captures,
They are taunting lures that catch the ones who seek them not,

Me:

Thy fears are nigh, 
Thy sight is blind,
You fear a creature you cannot understand,
Of such is the ignorance of man,
Hungry is the fish on the lure,
Or caught it is not,
Lusting for the bait,
Too blind to wait,
Puzzle it through,
Or so easy it is to catch one that is you,

Him:

The pain of he who harms others is more bitter,
Than the pain of he who has been harmed,
No life could be cheaper that the one of a man who knows his fate,
He who knows what life brings and still cannot escape,
He who wishes not to be caught must starve,
Or begin to see,

Me:

Angry is the bear,
Foolishly caught in the hunter's harsh snare?
Foolish not is the hunter,
For all the food he does plunder?

Him:

But in life there are always cubs,
Left to die for naught,
But for the bellies of one man,
And one bear.

Me:

Living is learning,
Stupidity is refusing the gift of seeing,
The hero gets the girl,
For did he not just save her world?
Life has rules,
Knowledge gives tools,
Pain gives experience,
Wounds wrought of injustice's barbed fence,

Him:

Why must man plunder his wages?
Can he not see the ones he has butchered,
Laying in his wake?
Life has rules, 
But I've yet to see the book,
If life is such a game,
Who is playing?
Is it you or I?
Is it those who sit quietly behind dead stars,
And broken wishes?
Until it is their turn to use all as their pieces?

Me:

Boy dear boy,
Does thou not think love a ploy?
Wrought only to ensnare and employ?
What is wrong with his wake?
For all the work, him did it take?
Bear would eat him if he not brought her down,
Or in his blood she would leave him to drown,

Him:

But who's to say he does not deserve to die?
He who steals from himself and calls it gain?
Who judges him but himself?

Me:

Oh how cruel thy heart!
Did you not want to keep what thou find?
Lies! Lies!
If thou does deny,
Giving all you have,
Is letting one take all,
Did you not say such was bad?
Why should it be you or I who is to fall?
Who decides who gets all?

Him:

If this game of life,
Has a victor,
Be it the lover,
Or she who slowly drags him beneath the water,
Laughing as he drowns?

Me:

Keeping what you've got,
And defending what you've wrought, 
Who is to say she is dragging him down?
Instead of trying to stop him of drown,
What is if is her sobbing,
Not cruel laughing?
Defeated thou art,
Right from the very start,
For truth trumps all,
Leaving deaf fools to fall,
For if you ignore her,
Struck you are with her sharp poisoned burr,

Him:

The clock keeps ticking,
On and on it goes,
I have seen its end,
And yet none I can tell,
But the mistress of the sea is cunning,
As those on their ship see her save him,
As he fights against chains of false love,
Love is ignorance,

Ignorance while swimming is death,

Me:

The stars may fade,
Giving light to new day,
The moon may fall,
To give the sun shine above all,
Envy not their cruel beauty,
For it is beauty all around to see,

Him:

Men cannot see,
Yet still the sailors sense that there was more blindness,
Than love could bring in the waves that night,
Stars do not fade,
They die quickly and violently,
Ripping apart planets,
Such as she ripped out my heart,

Me:

If ripped is your heart,
Then your soul bitter and tart!
It is not her who tore,
But you, standing at sea shore,
For you let it be,
You who gave way to misery!
Where is your fight, your zest for life?
Men say fair maiden is theirs to lay,
But who gives them such claim?
She is not property,
Just as they try to claim the sea,
No right to touch or hold,
But story after story is told,
Heartless lies,
Sharp as knives,
So why can't she claim as they?
And instead of give,
Why cannot she take?

Him:

The sea takes all,
With no heart it breaks ships and devours,
Sparing none,
Them why do I ache?
How her memory haunts me!
What is life if I cannot have her?
Because she has not memory of me,

Me:

Lean to swim dear child,
And she will be mild,
Go to sink,
And she will not for give you your drink,
Of salty sea,
Ignorant stupidity,
Pain is a teacher,
Getting harder and harder,
So you may learn your end,
Pain is no enemy, nor friend,

Him:

If I must drink I shall,
To thee I drink,
She is fair, but foul,
Who is beautiful, yet beastly,
I drink to thee, and die,
But after I die, 
Know that I remembered you in my parting,
Though thou hast forgotten me,
Goodbye and never more,

Me:

Goodbye, goodbye,
Forgotten you have not I,
Moved to escape my pain,
Memory of you in my heart lain,
Goodbye goodbye,
Fault thy not at thou sweetly die,
And so must I,
Goodbye goodbye.